Asexuality Defined

Alright. So, I realized something worthy of a facepalm this morning, after an almost full-night's sleep.

I forgot to explain what exactly asexuality is. (Remember when I said I could be downright stupid in my introductory post?)

Anyway. I've come to correct that, and I'm going to define it in the most thorough, easiest to understand way as possible. Don't be surprised if I get a bit carried away.

Asexuality is a sexual orientation, just like homosexuality, heterosexuality or bisexuality. An asexual person is defined as a person who doesn't experience sexual attraction, or does but does not wish to act on it.

Let's say I don't like cheesecake. I just don't like cheesecake, and that's that. I may want cheesecake sometimes, but that doesn't mean I'm going to eat it because I know I won't like it. And if somebody offered me a plate of cheesecake, I'm going to say no. Because I just don't like cheesecake and that's that. No. I will not, and I mean never ever ever ever meet the right cheesecake that will turn me into somebody who loves cheesecake. And if somebody sets the best plate of cheesecake in the world on my lap and I try it, am I going to like it?

Probably not.

The same thing could be said about an asexual person. They won't be interested in sex even if they meet somebody who's "the best in bed" for them. They won't meet the right sex partner, because they're just asexual and that's that. If an asexual person engages in the best sex in the world, will they like it? Well, in all honesty, they might. But that doesn't mean they'll be attracted to people for the purpose of having sex with them in the future.

Now, just because we're not interested in sex, doesn't mean we're not capable of love.

There is both romantic and sexual orientations, and one can differ from the other. Somebody could be an aromantic asexual (not interested in romance or sex), or maybe a heteroromantic asexual (interested in people of the opposite gender, but not for sex), or even, like myself, a panromantic asexual (can be interested in all genders, but not sex with them).

There are two types of asexuals: Indifferent and repulsed. An indifferent asexual doesn't really care about sex, or even finds it fascinating or engages in it for pleasure, but never for the emotional aspect. A repulsed asexual is just that, repulsed by all things sexual, and even sometimes the thought of sex.

Some asexuals have what is called a libido. A libido is sexual desire, a metaphor I once saw and liked was on www.asexuality.org. It described how a libido was like an itch. You could want help scratching the itch from somebody of the opposite gender (heterosexual), or somebody from the same gender (homosexual), or somebody from either gender (bisexual), and there are many more people that anybody could want their "itch" scratched by. If somebody is asexual with a libido, they could just scratch their itch themselves (you know what I'm talking about).

Basically, in the most blunt terms possible; Whether you masturbate is not a contributing factor to whether you're asexual or not.

Thanks for reading, and adios for now.
-Jay